2 already???

It's Gold.....
and oh sooo shiney!!

Is it really true? Could my sweet baby actually be 2 years old today? It seems like just yesterday we were in the NICU holding our little 2 1/2 pound bird! For Easter we had a BBQ with my Mom and my Sister and law's family. Isaac got to open a couple of gifts, but even with all of his new cause and effect toys all he wanted to play with was his most favorite toy of all............his gold foil! It's so crinkley and shiney and oh sooooo nice!! Sam said that maybe it reminds him of heaven.

Isaac's Birthday & A Strange Phase I Went Through

Only 13 more days until Isaac’s 2^nd birthday! I can’t believe it! I’d like to say I have big plans, but I’m actually waiting to see how my Dad is feeling after having surgery on his arm yesterday. He fell on black ice while getting out of his delivery truck 2 weeks ago and fractured his arm. (ouch!)

I will assure you that Isaac will be getting tons of kisses on those sweet cheeks from his Mama for being such a trooper the past 2 years! It hasn’t been easy for him, but he somehow manages to still be the happiest kid on the block. When I’m feeling sorry for myself I just look at him and see how happy he is all the time in spite of his limitations. He’s my inspiration!

Although I’m looking forward to birthday festivities I keep thinking about this strange phase I went through right after his first birthday.

I tried to convince myself right after finding out Isaac’s diagnoses that even though it was hard, I would just “get over it” within a couple of weeks. As if I was Superwoman or something I spent the first year trying to stay strong, live in the moment and survive. The house was busy with nurses and we were in and out of the hospital. There was no time to dwell on emotions.

At the 1 year mark I went into this phase I like to call “where in the world did that come from?” Reality hit me like a brick and I had to sort through some unprepared emotions. Was this a bad thing? No, it was a great thing! Although it took me a couple of months to get out of my “fog” I came out better, stronger and more able to accept Isaac’s disability.

Maybe I'll visit another phase after his 2nd birthday, maybe I won't, but I know now that as much as I would like to call myself Superwoman, I'm not and I have to let myself go into that "fog" once and awhile and know it's OK!

But seriously, who could be sad for long with that sweet face!

Baby Steps

It's almost Friday the 13th and you know what that means, don't you? Isaac's 2nd birthday is 1 month away!! Our sweet baby came into the world on Friday, April the 13th 2007. Since then Isaac has taken many baby steps. One of our biggest goals for him before he turned 1 years old was to have him smile and recognize us. Most parent's hope to have their children walking, talking and eating finger foods by then. Not us, we wanted interaction, not to mention less hospital stays! When he looked directly at me and smiled big around 9 months old that was huge. Now even though he can't verbalize much, when he's feeling well he has a lot to give and he's being more intent on signing bye bye, hi, mama and food.

Ok, so I admit, I'm only human and when I think of how delayed he is at almost 2 years old it is discouraging. Like most mom's with special needs kids I struggle with the what if's, but I have to remember that Isaac is going to do what Isaac is going to do in Isaac's time and we will take what we can get!

His lungs are still questionable due to head colds and teething. I had the date wrong on Isaac's pulmonology appointment and I was soooo glad because of the snow and the 9 degree weather we were having! It's not fun, let me tell ya having to drive a medically fragile child around town in the ice and snow. We will go this Monday, it should warm up to 50 degrees by then. Then maybe we can finally welcome spring! Yay!


Colleen

Communicating

Speech...not always easy for a little guy with a trach and a developmental disability, but I've been trying to teach him sign language the past 4 months. The day we noticed he was waving goodbye to his home nurse Linn was quite a day as we both wanted to cry tears of joy. It took us a minute to realize what he was doing! Sign language is not easy for Mr. Isaac. He was born with some fingers that do not bend easily and moving his hand towards his chin requires some coordination. So in the photo I'm teaching him the sign food. It takes a minute for him to get the hand down from the top of his head down to his chin. Since just recently he has been able to tolerate the valve for more than an hour, he is finally starting to make sounds when he is happy or trying to express himself. Very cute. He also likes to play a game where he puts his hand to my mouth and I make funny noises and he laughs so hard. He is wearing his muire valve (speaking valve) most of the afternoon without any oxygen and keeping up his saturation levels! YAY!

Welcoming 2009

Wow, time flies when you're having fun! I can't believe that Isaac will be 2 years old in April! For someone who was possibly not supposed to survive birth, well...we're doing pretty good. Many emotions flood me when I think about the celebration of this milestone. It is a celebration, but also bittersweet as he still is very medically fragile and has some major developmental delays. I have many goals for him this year now that we are not so much into survival mode. Don't get me wrong...we are still in survival mode, but we are not in the hospital as much...thank goodness! Last year my main goal for Isaac was to stay out of the hospital. Well we did a pretty good job in 2008. Isaac's most recent trip to the hospital was an outpatient procedure on Monday January 12th to have his right ear tube replaced and a sedated hearing exam done. The exam showed that Isaac has hearing loss in both ears. All we know is he lights up whenever we talk to him and he loves his Mama. The above photo is of my Dad with Isaac...we were celebrating a belated Christmas right after the New Year.